Realised I have turned into a negative person, haven't had any constructive self-talk to myself for years...
I miss the old me full of confidence, happy and motivated to do everything, try every new thing, why has Architecture made me into this? I used to scored A's with ease, I have excellent logical thinking, I have my own self discipline, but in this practise, I lost it, all.
Remembered I once talked to Sze Hua before entering architecture, don't look too highly of me, I will try, however am prepared for everything. Yes, now that we can conclude on the conversation, I am such a failure in this...
I try to love my course, my life, my living, but I cannot stop it from pushing me down, I hate it.
I am feeling harder and harder to breathe, go blank everytime I looking at the cad drawings, have no confidence, have no courage to talk to people, I have been looked down, I hate it.
May it just be something period, over, forward the time fast to pass through remaining 1 year 2 months, my only wish now...
Suddenly I miss riding around during wee hours on carless roads of KL city.
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4 comments:
Hey Ken,
I just stumbled across your blog and I want you to know - you're not alone and it's not too late.
You seem unhappy, and like you've lost your confidence.
Make a change. In your life and in your mind - you can always choose to be happy again.
Start to see the great things about your life, about architecture, about you. Focus on those.
Good luck!
Love,
CarolAnn
http://CharismaU.com
hey beng!its me:yasmin..hehe..i felt dat way too..i guess we all (arhi students) did..to cheer u up,i have always tot (since 1st yr) u might be a great architect someday..u hv ur own thoughts of mind and looked at things in other perspective..seriously..u r good..just throw away all ur negativity!seriously!
Thanks Carol and Yasmin, yes, I will do my best to pull myself through this.
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